How to Stop Smoking
by the-vampire-act
Summary: Character study; preslash at the very end.  After Prentiss' supposed death, Spencer decides to cash in on some of his vacation time to finally do things that he wanted to do... and, well, some he didn't.


**BTW, the post-it note exists! Its like all over the internet now! (Er, just read the story) Hittin' the town- Reid style! PLEASE NOTE that this take place in between the short period of time (I'm assuming it was somewhere between a week or three) in Lauren between Prentiss' alleged death and her alleged funeral, for I doubt that they could have whipped that all up in less than a week…Suggestive slash-friendship at the end.**

**How to Stop Smoking**

_5:30 am: Wake Up_

Spencer Reid woke up. That was how he found his best days were started, after all. Slugging himself out of bed, he threw off his clothes and started off for a shower. Afterwards, he chose an outfit for the day at random.

_6:15 am: Coffee_

'The most important meal of the day,' Reid sighed to himself. "Thanks," he smiled half-heartedly as he took the cup from the Starbuck's employee behind the counter. When he looked at the cup, though, he frowned. "Couldn't afford the ink to write 'Starbuck's Coffee' anymore?" he asked to no one in particular.

"Seems like it," the brunette smirked. "Have a nice day, Doctor," she smiled, and for a brief second Reid envied her. He hadn't smiled so sincerely and so meaningfully in a long time. He truly envied her for that, no matter how silly what he was envious for was.

"Yeah, you too."

_6:45 am: Arrive at work approximately one hour and fifteen minutes earlier than usual. (as per usual of the last two months, actually) _

Reid sucked down his coffee as he waited at his desk, once more grimacing at the new Starbuck's symbol. With the amount of money he spent a week on the steamed liquid- and not to count the millions of other Americans who did the same as well- one would think that they would in fact be able to afford a few extra letters….

"Reid, my office," Hotch barked as he passed the bullpen. Reid stood up and obediently followed, his only hesitation being to look at the semi-empty desk opposite of his own. His eyes caught the heart-shaped green post-it note on his desk and shook his head as he continued off.

_7:15 am (give or take an hour; may be repeated frequently as well): Someone states concern about well-being of self_

"What's on your mind, R-_Spencer?" _Hotch asked, pretending to shuffle papers on his desk.

"I'm presuming you're wondering about the one that is 'eatin' at me', as Morgan says?"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about," Hotch sighed, obviously annoyed at the younger man's antics.

_7:30 am: End conversation with promise to talk to said person 'whenever you're ready' _

"Yes, I promise Hotch," Spencer nodded. Then, wordlessly, he walked out of the office, all the while wondering if anyone would ever realize he had been lying the whole time.

_7:20-7:54 am: Pretend to do something and/or commence working experience _

Today, Spencer decided to try writing to his mother. He hadn't wrote in a while, and he worried that his mother would start, well, worrying. Picking up a pen and a piece of stationery, he began:

_Mom, _

_It's been a while, I know, but I've been very busy. You've always told me that mothers can sense things- that they're like animals that way. I suppose you already know that something's happened, but whether or not you've been informed of it, I have no clue. First of all, I met an autistic boy whose parents died. I played piano with him, and I swear to you that he was the smartest kid I've ever met. I've been having headaches lately, but don't worry. They're getting better- I think- and I know that I'm probably overreacting, anyways. It's possibly just the cigarettes I've been having and trying to quit. I hate withdrawals, and with everything else that's been happening, I decided to try and quit later on. I still have the headaches, though…The BAU leader forced JJ to leave, by the way; I miss her like crazy. She used to know me so well, and she always knew how to make me feel better. Emily Prentiss, the black-haired woman that I've talked about before, is dead. Turns out I was right- something was wrong…._

Spencer moaned as he crumpled the paper up. The truth was worse, after all, and that truth was ten times worse to a paranoid schizophrenic. So he started again:

_Mom,_

_It's been a while, I know, but I've been very busy. I've taken up the piano- well, keyboard really- and I am really liking it. Maybe I can come and play you something whenever I come to visit again. I've been having some health issues, but I blame the Virginia weather. I suppose you can't throw a Vegas boy in Virginia and expect him to adjust to the weather, and even if I've been living here a while, it's still hasn't grown on me. The team's been having some problems with positioning team members, by the way. Some people are off more often than others, are scheduled weeks off for whatever reason, stuff like that. I swear if feels like half of my team has been gone for entire months now! Ah well, it is a tough time, anyways. Hope you've been feeling well. I'll be down to see you as soon as I can, promise. _

_Sincerely,_

_-Spencer_

_8:59 am- ? pm/am: Work until exhausted, then work some more _

After the case had ended, the team decided to sleep in until the next morning before heading home. He sighed as he laid his head down on his stuffy hotel pillow. Pretending that he was going to sleep, he turned off the light and tucked himself in.

_Unscheduled but reoccurring event: Team goes home and does *insert coping mechanism here* until feelings of dread numb/subside _

Spencer Reid lit up. Again. And again. And….well, not again. He did have his limits, after all. Stubbing the cigarette butt in the ashtray that some of the tenants had placed on the roof for occasions such as this, he sighed and trudged down steps that lead to his apartment floor. Opening the door mechanically and preparing himself for night the same exact way, he carelessly tossed his messenger bag to the floor, placed his mother's letter he had just wrote in the 'out-mail' pile, and once again jumped in the shower. Knowing that no one was waiting for him, Spencer took his time in the shower. He let the unnecessarily hot water burn his skin as his shaky hands shampooed and conditioned his hair. Slumping to the floor of his tub, he closed his eyes and moaned. He was so _tired_…..

_About 9:30-10 pm: 'Unexpected' (of course, actually expected, but he couldn't let them know that now could he?) phone call number 1...or maybe it was 3..._

Cold water assaulting his skin was the first thing he noticed when he woke up. Frowning, he fluttered his long eyelashes and tried to keep his eyelids open. After a few minutes, though, he couldn't stand the water anymore and reached over to turn it off. Groaning as the phone started ringing again, he threw a towel around himself and headed out toward the living room, just narrowly catching the phone in time before it went to voice mail. "Yeah?" he asked, exasperated.

"Caught ya at a bad time, Pretty Boy?" Morgan asked.

"Yeah, let's go with that."

_10-11pm: Pretend to sleep until mind is satisfied and/or tricked into thinking its body rested (whichever comes first) _

_Repeat until retirement. _

~* CT *~

_5:30 am: Wake up…._

Spencer Reid started the next day differently. He didn't know how- or why, to be honest- but he knew it was different somehow. He took his shower, strategically put on his purple shirt with matching( 'ish, matching-_ish_,' according to Garcia), and headed off to the coffee shop.

_6:15 am: Coffee_

"Good morning, Dr. Reid," the brunette employee greeted brightfully. "The usual?"

Spencer thought for a moment- actually _considering _what coffee he might have instead of his usual. Then, as if testing fate, he said, "I'll take whatever you recommend."

"Well, I'm proud of you Doctor, but do you really want to put your coffee needs in my hands? I mean, that's like trusting the idiots who print our cups with your liver…."

"I think your hands are capable enough," Spencer grinned. "I've been coming to this coffee shop for four years, seven months, three weeks, and two days. I think you, um, understand my _delicate _palette by now."

Laughing as she stirred his coffee together, she replied, "Yeah, I only hope that I don't disappoint!" She secretly stirred the coffee with another nameless flavoring, smiling as she capped it and walked the drink over to counter. "Go on, try it!"

Spencer took a sip of it, smiling as he realized how sugary it was but inwardly frowning at the actual taste of it. "You know me too well," he laughed, lying through his teeth.

"I try," she smiled back. "It's caramel, actually, with extra sugar and extra-extra caramel for my favorite regular."

Spencer placed the money on the counter, instructing her to keep the change as he folded his wallet back into his messenger. "Thanks for the coffee," he said.

"Hey, it my job!" she shrugged. "See you tomorrow, Dr. Reid- well, assuming you're in town. Have a great day!"

"Yeah, you too." Spencer walked out of the coffee shop, grimacing at the coffee once he was out of sight. He stared down at it, wondering if he should grin and bare it or just toss it. Suddenly, his messenger bag started slipping from his shoulder, so he took a hand off the cup to fix it. He frowned down at his hand when he realized there was a small black smudge in his palm. He glanced back down at his cup and immediately smiled. The brunette woman had Sharpee-ed in 'Starbuck's Coffee' in an elegant script. Looking back, he realized that she had done it to other cups, too; a man in a red cap came out smiling with the same cup, and behind him a woman with a man shared a cup while laughing at the joke. Satisfied, he continued walking beofre smirking as he spotted a garbage can just out of reach. Then, once he was a safe distance from the shop, he threw it away and continued to work.

_6:45 am: Arrive at work approximately one hour and fifteen minutes earlier than usual. (as per usual of the last two months, actually) _

Spencer didn't bother putting his stuff on his desk; today, he headed straight to his boss' office. Tapping on the door, he waited for the signal to come up. He didn't hesitate when he heard the reply, and he helped himself into the office with a bounce in his step.

"What is it, Reid?" Hotch frowned.

"I want to cash in on some of my vacation time."

Hotch stared up at Reid, and if the younger agent hadn't known any better, he'd swear that the man had gone into shock. He couldn't help but smile a bit at the unHotch-like behavior. It took a lot to shock Hotch, so the fact that him taking vacation time off had, he knew that it was long overdue.

"Why, may I ask?" he questioned.

"I just want some time…_off," _Spencer shrugged.

"Where are you going- if you are going somewhere?"

"Disneyworld."

Or, at least his equivalent of Disneyworld anyways.

_9:05 am: Arrive home from work; grab go-bag and get the hell out of Quantico. _

Spencer honestly had no idea where he was going, but if he was being honest, he didn't give a damn. Looking around the freeway signs, he grinned childishly and turned on the first exit sign. Once he was on a main road, he stopped at the closest gas station. After getting gas, he went inside the convenience store attached to it and headed straight down the candy aisle. He picked up a Snickers, a Reese's, a can of nuts, and a beef jerky-cheese combo stick. Then, he made his way to the counter and requested a pack of cigarettes.

_10:24am: The Smithsonian Museum of DC_

Spencer smiled as the tour guides offered useless information about the museum artifacts that he could easily put to shame. He kept his mouth shut, though; it was his day off, after all. He watched as children danced around, excited to be out of school and inside the monstrous museum instead.; families and couples marched all around while a few strays- like himself- just wandered around with a smile.

Spencer's eyes caught sight of a gift shop sign and an idea struck him. The young man walked inside and looked around. He automatically started profiling the novelty items with the people they were to go to and immediately starting picking items up. The stuffed tyrannosaurus rex stuffed animal would go to Henry, the monarch butterfly necklace to JJ, and the reusable water bottle with 'Daddy's Carbon Footprint' written on the side of it for Will. Smirking, he continued on his search. For Jack, he chose an assorted box of dinosaur-themed cars, and for Jack's father an Egyptian-themed photo frame that Hotch could put a picture of Jack in. Knowing about Rossi's 'secret' postcard collection, he picked up a few postcards, and for Morgan a pair of headphones with 'SM' engraved in a skulls as ear buds along with a matching keychain. Reid chose a small stuffed animal wearing a 'SM' hoodie and an outgoing-looking pen complete with feathers and glitter for Garcia. Seemingly satisfied, Reid purchased his items and left the museum.

_1:48pm: Library of Congress _

Spencer finished off his beef jerky and cheese before shutting the door of his car behind him. Breathing in the chilly air, he started to walk slowly to the building. Once inside he walked straight to the fifth table of the fourth row, the one farthest away from any windows. He plopped his books on the counter and let his bag fall to the floor. Getting comfortable, he situated the thick textbook on his lap and delved into its pages.

_3:55pm: Diner of Fourth Street_

Spencer smiled as the diner door slid closed behind him. He was satisfied with the progress he had made while reading the Latin textbook, so to reward himself he decided to eat out for lunch. 'Well, brunch actually,' a small voice in the back of his mind corrected.

"Hey Sugar, what can I get for you today?" a black-haired waitress asked pleasantly.

"Hmm… I think I'll have the Caesar salad with the three for a dollar cookies, please," Spencer responded, not bothering to look at the menu. 'One of the few perks of having an eidetic memory,' Spencer thought to himself.

"Chocolate?"

"Yes, please," Spencer nodded.

The waitress quickly scribbled down the order before turning her attention back to him. "Would that be it? No drinks?"

Spencer paused; he would regret not getting a drink, so he skimmed over the menu in his head and narrowed down his options one by one. As he thought, he gave the menu that hadn't been used back to the woman, and just then did he remember the smudge mark caused by the coffee incident.

"Actually, I'll have a large coffee as well."

_4:55pm: Grocery Shopping _

In truth, he hadn't planned on going shopping, but once he drove by a grocery store and remembered that he hadn't been shopping in two months, one week, and five days, he decided that he needed food. He strolled down the aisles, only glancing up on the shelves when he wasn't sure if he was grabbing the right things. Tossing the food in the buggy, he kept on going until he reached the fruits, as he preferred not to throw his fruits. Unsure when or if he'd be home in time to eat the fruits before they spoiled, he settled for bananas and cherries before strolling off to the diary aisle. Smirking as the people around him stared in disbelief, he grabbed a gallon of fat free milk and a tub margarine butter blindly. Suddenly, someone tapped on his shoulder and knocked him out from his trance.

"How can you _do _that?" a small child asked in amazement. Her father quickly grabbed her, though, and carefully placed her back in the cart. "Uh, sorry," he quickly apologized. "She's always been a little curious-"

"Oh, it's okay," Spencer chuckled. "I have an eidetic memory, so I'm used to it by now."

"What's io-det-tic?" the little girl frowned.

"Do you know what a photographic memory is?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah! It's when you remember a bunch of stuff!" she replied enthusiastically. "I got a friend who's got that!"

"Well, an eidetic memory is basically that, but people with it remember a whole lot more," Spencer smiled.

"Wow- I wish I had that!"

"Thanks man," the father smiled.

"Yeah, no problem," he nodded.

Then, they both went on their own ways.

_5:46pm: Spencer's apartment _

After putting his groceries away, Spencer jogged to the roof of his apartment building. Puffing a cigarette, he realized that there was someone following up from behind him. He turned his head sharply as he realized who it was. Sighing, he prepared himself to face the music.

"I should be shocked that you're smoking," she sighed, "but sadly I'm not."

"I know you're against them, but it's better than the other alternatives I've thought up," Spencer mumbled. He scooted over on the small roof so that Penelope Garcia could stand opposite of him. The blond woman wrapped her hand around his shoulder, kissing the boy's cheek when his cigarette was from his mouth. Seconds later, he put it out in exchange for Garcia's company. "Come on, let's go back to my apartment.'

_6:30pm: Wait on couch with unexpectedly excepted guest, waiting for them to tell you that they're checking up on you_

"I'm okay Garcia, really," Spencer smiled.

"I'm not buying it," she replied calmly. "After you took the day off, I knew that something was wrong. You never take time off...or smoke."

"Actually, I've been smoking for a while," Spencer murmured. "And I needed to get groceries-"

"Now I know you didn't take the day off just to get groceries," Garcia glared. "So tell me, why did you?"

Spencer bit his lip; there were many possible answers that he could have given her. He could have said that he was trying to finally cope with the Prentiss' death, resting his mind and his body, catching up on his work for his latest BA, simply needing a change in scenery….

But instead, he blurted out, "I'm trying to quit smoking."

_One Week Later: SSA Emily Prentiss' Funeral _

The coffin was buried, the day was ending, and the people were gone.

Well, most of the people were gone, anyways.

Standing opposite of Spencer Reid, Aaron Hotchner wrapped an arm around Spencer's shoulder. He let the younger man's sobs die down into tears, then to just quiet and stray tear drops. Finally he found it appropriate to approach him.

"How are you?" he asked gently.

"Good, good," Spencer murmured, leaning heavily on the older man.

"Yeah, that's believable," Hotch muttered. "Now tell me, what's really on your mind?"

Spencer didn't respond right away. What _wasn't _on his mind? His constant headaches; his conversation with Garcia; his mother's health; Prentiss' death; JJ forced out of the BAU; the boy- Sammy- placing his hands over the piano keys…

"I stopped smoking, you know," he said instead.

"Explains why you've been more on-edge lately…." Hotch mused.

"That- and all the other things that have happened this year are finally catching up on me," Spencer sighed.

Hotch waited for Spencer to continue, but when he realized that he wasn't going to, Hotch instead reached for his pockets and produced a pack of cigarettes. He passed them to Spencer, but he merely shook his head. "I quit, remember?"

"If you say so," Hotch nodded, obviously less than convinced. Then, placing his hand on Spencer's shoulder again, he lead him away from the graveyard. "Come on, let's get you home."

_10pm: Back home_

Spencer Reid and Aaron Hotchner stared out over the top of Spencer's apartment building. The two men untied their ties and threw off their jackets. Nursing beers, they stood in silence as the world continued all around them. Eventually, Spencer grew weary of his alcohol and instead reached for his lighter. He then grabbed at the pack of cigarettes he still carried with him and lit up.

"I thought you quit, Hotch frowned.

"Yeah, well," Spencer sighed, tears slipping from his eyes again, "there's always tomorrow, isn't there?"

Hotch sighed, nodding his head in understandment. Then, he reached for his beer and took in a long gulp. Shaking his head, he waited until Spencer put out his cigarette before he guided him back inside the apartment. "Come on, R-_Spencer, _it's going to be a long night."

***~ HTSS *~**


End file.
